Birds

[after a long discussion about how chickens freak me out and that I really don’t like birds in general]

Student 1: How can you not like birds?

Me: I just don’t.  They’re OK to look at from a distance, you know, with glass separating us.

Student 2: You don’t like any birds?

Me: Nope.

Student 3: What about ducks?

Me: Nope.

Student 4: Even doves?

Me: Are doves birds?

Student 4: Yes.

Me: Then no.

Student 5: What about parrots?

Me: (raised eyebrows)

Student 5: Everybody likes parrots.

Class: (looking at me expectantly)

Me: (Shake my head)

Student 5: You’d like MY parrot.

Me: Probably not.

Student 6: What if I brought in a bird, you know, like an eagle or something.

Me: I’d leave.

[slight lull in the conversation]

Student 7: (raises his hand)

Me (after a sigh): Yes?

Student 7: What about owls?

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