You dated Shaquille O’Neal?!

A few weeks ago, while trying to illustrate the extreme height of Vikings to my class, we had this dialogue:

Me: According to the book, Vikings are well over six feet tall. I’m 5’6″, so that’s at least this tall (I stand on tippy-toes and point way above my head)

Student 1: (with a big grin) Like me!!

Me: (Laughing) Nope, you and I are almost the same height! Let me put it this way, I went on a date with a guy once who was 6’10” – I came up to his armpit.

Student 1 (suddenly shouting): He’s 7’15”!!

Me: (mock irritated look) Really?! Anyway, the tallest guy I know of is Shaquille O’Neal and he’s 7’1″.

Student 2: (visibly impressed and clearly not really listening) You dated Shaquille O’Neal?!

Me: Yes, when I was 12, I dated Shaquille O’Neal but alas I didn’t lock that down and he became The One Who Got Away.

OK, I made this last line up, I really said, “No, I never dated Shaq, he’s old enough to be my dad.” (Which I now know to be false; he’s only 8 years older than me lol)


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