Watching “Outlander” to help me stay focused on writing division word problems… says every math teacher ever!
“OMG! Grow up, gentlemen. The word is ‘come.’ C-O-M-E. It means to move in a certain direction. Let’s move on!”
Student: You’re giving a final?! None of my other teachers are giving me finals!!
Student: Have you been to [local BBQ restaurant]?
Me: No, but I think I’m going on Monday.
Student: Oooooooh, is it a daaaaate?
Me: No, it’s with a friend.
Me: Her name is Mina, she has a husband and two kids.
Student (trying to be sexy, succeeded in being creepy): Tell her I say “Heeeeeeeey Mina”
Me: Dude, stop being weird.
Student (on repeat): Heeeeeeeeey Mina, heeeeeeey heeeeeeeey Mina, Meeeeeeeeeeeeena…
“Tutoring canceled” two of the sweetest words I’ve heard today…
Another episode in Things I never thought I’d have to shout out in Geometry class:
MADONNA IS NOT BLACK!
You know you’ve arrived when in the space less than 8 hours:
One student refers to you as “a middle aged math teacher who needs to use bath bombs to relax after a long day of teaching.” #sciencefairpresentation
Another student, who just told me she’s suspended for two days (including first day of finals), said “Wow, you got angrier than my parents!” #tutoringwin
You must be 18 or older to say “that’s what she said.”
You’re the strongest woman I know… after my mom, grandma, and aunties.
Student 1: (Giving me shit)
Student 2: (Defending me)
Me (to Student 2): It’s ok, dude, I got this, I’m a big girl.
Student 3 (loudly): Yeah, you are.
Me: (moving on)
Student 3: Physically. (pause) You’re big physically.
Me: (nodded a him, and then tried to move on)
Student 3: You’re fat.
Me (surprised): Did you just call me fat?!
Student 4: (trying to avoid eye contact, muttered) This is fucking awkward…
Student 5: (also trying to avoid eye contact, muttered) So fucking awkward…
Student 3: You are fat! You’re fat like me!
Me: (but inside I’m like, he’s at least two of me! smh)